Snow

Christmas is coming and  I must admit that I’m starting to feel the Christmas spirit. I know that it isn’t even Thanksgiving yet but I’m a sucker for everything that has to do with the holiday. The mail is full of catalogs, the radio is already playing carols, Christmas tree lots are starting to open and my kids are bombarding me with present suggestions. The dog even came back from the groomer today with a Christmas bow tied around his neck.

We don’t get snow here but I am fortunate in that off in the distance I can see the mountains. They are already dusted with snow and soon they’ll have a lot more.  If I really need a snow fix I can load the family in the van and drive there for a day of sledding .  My wife and I grew up in the Midwest so we know how to act in the snow. We do the right thing and put chains on the tires, dress the kids warm and anything else that’s required so that we don’t have problems. But this being California it’s not always your behavior that gets you messed up, especially when it has to do with snow. There are a lot of steeyuuupid people out here who have absolutely no idea how to deal with snow, or any kind of weather for that matter. But snow is the worst.

I don’t know how many times we’ve gone up into the mountains and have seen a Mercedes, or some other expensive car,  stuck in a drift. The car has no chains, the guy driving is wearing clothes better suited for the beach and his date is in a short, short skirt and wearing stiletto heels.

You just know that earlier they were at the bottom of the mountain, bored, and one of them suddenly said, “Hey, it snowed in the mountains last night! Let’s go take a look!”

Then the two are stuck and he’s trying to get cell service on his phone for a tow and his girlfriend is freezing her over exposed ass off.

Then there are the drivers that you know are native Californians because every time there’s a little ice on the road they totally freak out. And when there’s a lot of ice they are hopeless.

My personal favorite Socal snow newbie is the guy with the big ass pickup truck that drives all the way up to the snow,  then shovels his truck bed full of the white stuff and then drives back down the mountain with it. We had some neighbors who did that so they could have snowball fights. It’s a lot of work but it just proves the magic of the white stuff. No matter how much you might hate it over a long period of time, there is still a magic grace period when it will bring out the kid in everyone. And if it’s Christmas, then that’s just an unbeatable combination.